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RADIATING LOVE AND CONTENTMENT

In essence, I’m a complete being who sips from my own well of validation. I don’t need another’s opinion, especially when the intentions in which it’s given aren’t sincere. Even when I decide to take advice from another, I’m not compelled to use it. Especially, if I don’t deem it fit to do so.

With that said, I’m not conceited. But rather, I’m the sort of person who is proud to present me with the chance to take centerstage in my life, to shine above everybody else in my universe.
To be the most beautiful person in my world, so beautiful as to make those who touch my being beautiful too. 

I love giving “ME” to the people who truly deserve me. I give selflessly to those who love me, trusting they’ll know how to handle my affection. Appreciating it for the delicate treat it is. Handling it with the attention a god would give to his mortal lover. Making sure he does not change her but, rather, enhance’s her whole being.

I love to love because I love myself that much. If you have not started loving the in the manner you feel you should, then it’s time you start loving yourself that MUCH.

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YOUR WOMAN CAN ONLY TOLERATE YOUR INSECURITY FOR SO LONG

How many times should one forgive the same mistakes?? This is a pertinent question… RIGHT? If your better half keeps making the same mistake, how many times should you forgive them??

I ask because, how do you quantify the number of times you are able to forgive someone? Should one even be counting? They say love is not perfect, it doesn’t judge and all that jazz. I agree. But when is it enough? At what point does one get to that point of no return??

For instance, when your better half keeps threatening to leave, when do you call them up on it? You know they are irrational at times and that pure logic sometimes escapes them… DAMN guys!!!!

I don’t know a red-blooded woman who can admit to ever meeting a guy who has their “insecurity issues” in check — no matter how smart or logical they are for most times. But, when, and for how long, do you brush it off and lick their “childish wounds and battle scars”?

Do you simply leave them be — to sort themselves out — or do you try and talk sense into them?
I think punching your better half in the gut and slapping them around — until “getting it together” sinks in — is the best solution.

Truth is, love is hard enough… GUYS! The last thing women need, is for you to parade your insecurity like a dangling willy that urgently needs to be supported by undies.
They occasionally (meaning it gets old, really fast) love that you lose it when you sense competition. But I implore you to get it together — for the sake of the woman you love and your relationship — before it’s too late.

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WHERE JOURNEYS END AND OTHERS BEGIN

Sometimes we come pretty close to things that seem the genuine article. They resemble it so much that we drop our guard and start believing they are. I suppose it’s true what they say, journeys begin where others end.

Though it saddens me to admit it, Muhle and I couldn’t weather the storm. It was bigger than both of us. Even with that said, accepting the reality is hard. There is so much to love about Muhle — that I don’t even know where to start or end.

As I unpack many aspects of my life I thought I’d shelved forever — in preparation for a new journey — I can’t help but wish Muhle farewell. I learnt a lot from Muhle. Our relationship pushed and stretched me to heights I never thought possible. It was like a permanent high; one I’m still jonesing for — even as I write this. Can I take something to forget?

I certainly hope and pray Muhle will find the kind of love and happiness I failed to provide.

I, on the other hand, am content that I gave it my all. Sometimes, however, our everything does not even begin scratch the surface of what the other desires. And that’s okay. It does not detract from who I am. It just means I wasn’t Muhle’s “IT”.

I’d like to thank all who sent me encouraging mail. Believe it or not, it kept me going. Sharing in some of your experiences, even in your blogs, was my comfort blankie. Once again, thanks.

With those sentiments expressed, I prepare for a path least treaded, the scenic route… LOL! Hope springs eternal as I pray it will lead me to greener pastures and uncharted waters that will get me to virgin territory — for me to discover and explore.

Although dusk has come, it’s not the end. It just means it’s time to search for a sunrise…

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CHANCE ENCOUNTER — WITH A DIFFERENCE

Experiences are the most wonderful gift life blesses us with. Whether good or bad, they affect us in ways that add to our character. In essence, they build us. What we take from them makes all the difference.

So I was at the doctor’s office, minding my business, when an elderly gentleman approached me. He told me I had “some spark” about me, nothing out of the ordinary… really. 

If I got a Rand for every time some elder told me that, I’d be rich… LOL! Anyway, I digress. But what he told me afterwards stayed with me.

He said: A granddad, who stays in Alaska, is sitting on the porch stirring into space when his granddaughter approaches him. She asks him what he’s thinking about.

He responds: “There are two wolves fighting in my head. The one is positive. The one is negative.
“The negative one is fighting fiercely with the positive one. But the positive one is fighting back just as hard — because it also wants to win.”

The granddaughter then asks: “So which one is going to win?”

He then turns to her — with a knowing look — and says: “The one I feed the most.” 

This got me thinking… hard. Did this man sense the storm raging in my head? Was he telling me this to appeal to my intellect?
I can’t say for sure. But after he told me that story, I was hooked on his words. This man had stories for days and even lifted my somber mood.

I may or may not forget him, but his story will stay with me for life.

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THE DAY I FELL IN LOVE WITH JO’BURG

Today I fell in love, once again. This, after I thought I was doomed to an empty, long, cold existence until the end of my days. Oh, dear heart of mine, thanks for opening up to the splendor about me. Johannesburg, thanks for embracing me. You are amazing.

My wonderful mother, Jo’burg, a name I’ve called you by since I was a child, you are the world to me. I don’t call you Johannesburg because you mean love, second chances, opportunity and happiness to me. You are warmth, optimism and contentment. Although I’ve been around the world, seen breath-taking places, you blow me away every time I open my eyes in your presence — as though it were the first time I’m seeing you.

Thanks for being strong, loving and caring. Many have called you a concrete jungle, a place of lost dreams and a merciless succubus who devours innocence. But I disagree. They refer to you that way because they are animals — who sort to harm your children. How dare they call you derogatory names? How could they be so blind to your beauty? Why do they deliberately ignore your tenderness?

I mean, you are the marvelous city of gold. Your streets are lined with promise, trust, patience and encouragement. Your sun rises in the west and sets in the east. The textures and richness of your dusk and dawn are like nothing in the whole universe — and it’s solar systems.

The rays of your sunshine kiss my skin every time you smile on the land. Your night skies are utopia, they rock and cuddle me gently into that goodnight.

My dear mother, thanks for reminding me who I am. That even if all seems lost, a ray of hope is only a smile away. I love you Jo’burg, Jozi maboneng (city of lights).

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LOUNGING WITH ZHANÉ

If ever musical beauty was a term in the dictionary, the song Crush by Zhané would define it. This masterpiece of a melodical gem has alwyas found relevence with its audience since it was released in 1997, making it cross-generational.

Zhané, best known for their 1993 hit Hey Mr D.J., which reached #6 in the US Top 40 Charts, was an American R&B/hip hop soul duo. They were part of Queen Latifah’s Flavor Unit (a crew made of New York and northern New Jersey’s emcees, DJs).

The group comprises Jean Norris (originally from Rhode Island) and Renee Neufville (born in Jamaica), who met while studying music at Philadelphia’s Temple University. They got their big break after meeting rap group Naughty By Nature’s Kay Gee. The producer was so impressed with them, that they got featured on the all-star compilation Roll Wit Tha Flava, on which their first single Hey Mr D.J. was released.
The success of that single earned them a contract with the record label Motown in 1994.

Pronounced Jah-Nay, their debut album, produced another two US Top 40 Charts hits. Groove Thang and Sending My Love achieved gold status at the end of 1994, and went on to platinum status two years later.

During 1995 and 1996, they were featured on tracks by Busta Rhymes and De La Soul. They also made songs that featured on the NFL Jams and NBA 50th Anniversary compilations, and on the Higher Learning and A Low Down Dirty Shame — for which the song Shame became their fourth Top 40 Charts hit — soundtracks.

In 1997, Zhané released their follow up album Saturday Night, which they co-produced with Kay Gee and Eddie F. It featured the hit single Request Line, which was later remixed with different lyrics and featured Queen Latifah. It peaked just below the Top 40 Charts.

Zhané has since been dissolved, which is a sad thing. The group made beautiful music that had a timelessness to it. One can only hope Norris and Neufville will get back together to, once again, give our ears pleasant sounds — that will stay with us for generations to come.

— Song of the week Feature